How I Destress My Life
by David James
When my special needs child is making verbal comments that put stress on me, I go to the family room in the lower level of the house and work on my hobby: stamp collecting. Or I will read a book. I like to read about history and also biographies of historical persons. One book I recently finished is Team of Rivals by Doris Kearns Goodwin. It’s a history of President Abraham Lincoln and his cabinet for the entire time Lincoln was in office. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the best, I would rate it a 10. Sometimes I also look at the atlas and daydream about places I’d like to visit. I would especially like to visit some national parks that we haven’t yet been to.
Another way of coping with my stress is to go outdoors and pull weeds. Making the yard look presentable gives me satisfaction because a clean yard makes me feel proud about where I live. One time when I was angry, I mowed the back yard in record time!
Sometimes my wife and I will go out on an evening walk. It helps to be able to talk on a quiet evening—and the exercise helps me get better sleep!
If I’m prepared for it, I try to be mentally strong when I’m trying to tell something to my child with special needs. If she begins to yell at me, I will calmly say, "You can stop yelling at me, or you can go to your room. The choice is yours." If I can repeat that several times, she then gets the message, or at least, I feel better by coping with the situation.
When I feel stressed out over dealing with my special needs child, I can vent about it by writing to my e-mail friend. I also read a book to escape. I go outside and cut down the bushes, also known as “pruning plants.” I do things that make me feel good, such as sewing (my hobby), listening to the Mariner’s baseball game, or listening to music. I have gotten excited about the F.Y.E. (For Your Entertainment) store by Fred Meyer in Bellevue. It has an extensive selection of Latino music. I have been enjoying Christian Castro, Eduardo Cruz, Chayanne, Allison, and Marc Anthony. I also feel destressed by listening to the Celtic Women, Keith Urban, and Rascal Flats. When I hear that song by Rascal Flats about My Wish, I think good thoughts for my special needs child’s future. Sometimes I look at the beautiful pot-holders made of loopers that my child has made for me and appreciate her sense of color and design. Going on walks also makes me feel more relaxed, gets me out of the house, and gives me a feeling of having more energy.
